Breaking up is hard to do

Evan broke up with me the other night.

Hypothetical future children got in the way. He wants them, I'm pretty sure I don't, and this is a situation in which compromise is not an option.

So there I am, at the Mets game, having just had my Diet Coke confiscated by security, only to be broken up with by Evan due to my frigid womb. And then I'm crying at the Mets game (and not just because sports are the devil), and he's crying (even though the Mets were winning), and the whole scene is just really way too emotional for a non-sports related issue at a baseball game.

I can't imagine loving any man ever again, or even seeing another man and not smacking him, to be quite honest, but hopefully that will pass. The good thing is that we decided to remain friends, which makes it seem less horrible, because we are very close and have been since we started dating. And in a sadistic way, I'm glad he cried a lot too, because at least that way I know it wasn't super-easy to ditch me.

But tomorrow we're going to a wedding together because his friend had to rearrange stuff earlier to fit in Evan + guest, so I'd feel bad not going. I think the hardest part is that when you're in a relationship for awhile, and things are going well, you have this vision of the future, and what your life is going to be like. And then all of the sudden, its shattered, and it's very frightening.

For a long time, I'd really thought that I found the one. I think I'm ok, but I still feel like I got run over by a truck.